Back to School
A GUIDE TO HELP YOUR TEEN GET READY FOR THE NEW SCHOOL YEAR
Dreading or can’t wait for school to start again?
The time has come! This guide is here to help you and your teen smoothly transition back into the school routine. The following steps offer practical advice to make the upcoming week more manageable and less stressful for everyone.
Below you’ll find specific strategies for handling situations where your teen may start to refuse school, ensuring you have the support and tools needed to address this challenge effectively.
5 Days Before School Starts
Start Adjusting Sleep Schedules: The transition from holiday sleep patterns to school routines can be challenging, especially if your teen has been sleeping in. To make this easier, start getting them up 30 minutes earlier each day until they reach their regular school wake-up time. This gradual change helps their body clock adjust without the shock of a sudden early rise on the first day. Encourage them to go to bed slightly earlier each night as well, aiming for a good 8-9 hours of sleep.
Review the Morning Routine: Take some time to talk about what the morning routine will look like. Discuss things like breakfast, showering, and getting dressed, so there are no surprises. You might even try a “practice run” one morning to see how smoothly everything goes and identify any potential issues.
Tips:
Involve your teen in planning their morning routine. It’s their morning, and starting off right is key to a good day, so be willing to compromise! Encourage them to have breakfast, but if they prefer to skip it, don’t worry—just make sure they have a snack for later. It’s quite common at this age for teens to be less interested in breakfast.
Give them responsibility by getting them accustomed to setting their own alarm. Agree to nudge them up to three times, but then leave it to them—you have your own day to start. If they’re late, they’re late. Stay in touch with the school and let them experience the natural consequences of their actions. It’s crucial for teens to learn about consequences at this age, as it helps them develop a sense of responsibility for the future.
Avoid becoming a nag or resorting to shouting, as this creates a negative atmosphere that teens are likely to withdraw from. Instead, establish strong, firm boundaries. Keep the school informed about any issues with lateness and work together to implement consequences. Don’t hide things from the school, as this can send the wrong message to your teen and suggest that you’re complicit in their behaviour
4 Days Before School Starts:
Organise School Supplies: Now is the perfect time to ensure all school supplies are ready. Go through the list of required items and make sure everything is accounted for, from notebooks and pens to calculators and sports gear. Let your teen personalise their items if possible—whether it’s choosing a new pencil case or decorating their notebooks. This can help them feel more excited and prepared for school.
Wardrobe Check: Go through your teen’s school wardrobe to ensure uniforms, shoes, and coats meet the school’s requirements and are comfortable for your teen. Check that everything is clean, fits well, and is ready to go. If anything needs replacing or mending, now’s the time to sort it out. Have a discussion about what they’ll wear on the first day, so there’s no last-minute panic.
Tips:
Within reason, allow your teen to have a say in selecting the items they need for school, such as shoes, jackets, bags, and other essentials. While it’s important to ensure that these items are practical and meet any school requirements, it’s equally important to consider your teen’s preferences. Compromise where you can, and remember that fitting in and having the ‘right stuff’ is incredibly significant to most teens.
The way they present themselves at school can have a big impact on their confidence and social interactions. By giving them some control over these decisions, you’re not only respecting their growing independence but also helping them feel more comfortable and accepted among their peers. This doesn’t mean you have to agree to every request, but finding a middle ground can make a big difference in how they feel about going back to school.
When your teen feels confident in how they look and what they’re carrying, it can reduce some of the anxiety that often comes with starting a new school year. So, while it’s essential to stick to practicalities, consider their point of view and find a balance that works for both of you.
3 Days Before School Starts:
Talk About Their Expectations: As the first day approaches, it’s normal for teens to feel a mix of excitement and anxiety. Sit down with your teen and ask them how they’re feeling about the new school year. What are they looking forward to? Are there any concerns or worries they’d like to talk about? Be available and open to listening, without judgment. Let them know you’re there to support them and that it’s okay to have mixed feelings.
Set Up a Study Space: If your teen doesn’t already have a designated study area, now’s a good time to create one. This space should be quiet, well-lit, and free from distractions. If they already have a study space, take a moment to refresh and organise it. Make sure it’s stocked with necessary supplies and is a comfortable place where they can focus on their homework and studies.
Tips:
Allow your teen to personalise their study area with items that make them feel comfortable and motivated, such as posters, a favourite lamp, or a desk organiser. This can help them take ownership of the space and feel more inclined to use it.
Ensure that the study area is free from distractions like TVs, video games, or other electronic devices not related to their schoolwork. Encourage them to keep their phone out of reach while they study, or use apps that limit distractions.
Provide organisational tools such as trays, folders, or a calendar to help them keep their work in order. Regularly encourage them to tidy up their space so it remains an effective environment for studying.
Make sure the chair is comfortable and the desk is at the right height to prevent strain. Adequate lighting is also important to reduce eye strain and keep them focused.
Ensure the study space is well-stocked with essentials like pens, notebooks, calculators, and any other materials they regularly need. Having everything within reach can reduce procrastination and help them get started on their work more quickly.
2 Days Before School Starts:
Visit the School (If Possible): If your teen is starting at a new school or moving up to a new year group, visiting the school beforehand can help reduce anxiety. Even if the school isn’t open for a full visit, walking by or driving past it can make the environment feel more familiar. This can be particularly helpful for teens who struggle with new environments or have anxiety about the unknown.
Review School Schedule: Go over their school schedule together, discussing what their day will look like—class timings, break times, and any extracurricular activities. If they have a locker, talk about how to organise it efficiently. Discuss strategies for managing transitions between classes and how to handle any potential challenges that might arise, like finding a new classroom or adjusting to a different timetable
Tips:
Use different colours to highlight different subjects or activities on their timetable. This makes it easier to read and helps your teen quickly identify where they need to be.
If your teen is worried about finding their way around, sketch a simple map of the school with key locations marked. They can carry this with them for the first few days.
If possible, walk through the transitions between classes, especially if they’re moving to different parts of the school. This helps them get a feel for the timing and distance.
Talk about where they might want to spend their breaks—whether it’s in a quiet spot, with friends, or in a particular area of the school. Having a plan can reduce the anxiety of unstructured time.
Discuss what they should do if something doesn’t go as planned— like getting lost, being late to class, or forgetting their timetable. Reassure them that it’s okay to ask for help and that everyone makes mistakes as they adjust to a new routine.
1 Day Before School Starts:
Prepare for the First Day: The day before school starts, focus on getting everything ready. Lay out clothes for the first day, pack the school bag, and ensure any necessary documents or forms are filled out and ready to go. Encourage your teen to take it easy in the evening—watching a favourite film or spending time with family can help them relax and ease any last-minute nerves.
Check-In and Reassure: Have a final check-in with your teen to see how they’re feeling about the first day. Offer reassurance and remind them that it’s completely normal to feel a bit nervous. Let them know that the first day is often the hardest, but it gets easier as they settle back into the routine. Remind them that they can always reach out to you if they need anything
Tips:
Make sure your teen knows that you’re available to talk if they have any last-minute concerns or worries. Listen without judgment and offer reassurance that they’re prepared and capable.
Sometimes it helps to share your own experiences of starting something new. Let them know that feeling nervous is natural, and even adults experience it too.
Highlight your teen’s strengths and remind them of past successes in similar situations. This can boost their confidence and help them feel more capable of handling the first day.
Agree on a way for them to check in with you during the day if they need reassurance—whether it’s a quick text during a break or a chat after school. Knowing they can reach out if needed can provide comfort.
Reassure your teen that it’s normal to feel a mix of excitement and anxiety before the first day. Encourage them to focus on the positive aspects, like seeing friends or learning something new.
